i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
Randomize
