Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
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