im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
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