He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
Randomize
