She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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