I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
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