problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
Randomize
