I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
