I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
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