She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
