we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
