I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Randomize