the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
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