i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize