i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
Randomize
