Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
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