i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
I need to wash the frat house off of me
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
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