he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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