my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Randomize
