Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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