porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
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