I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Randomize
