The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
