Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Randomize
