It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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