If i come over, it means nothing
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
Randomize
