I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
Randomize