At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
