I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
Randomize
