don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
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