Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
i just wanna soil my oats bro
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
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