i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
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