Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
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