Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
Randomize
