Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
Randomize
