Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
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