I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
Randomize
