In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Randomize
