my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
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