There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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