I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Randomize
