margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
