community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
