google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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