Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
