he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
