Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
Randomize
