Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
