yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
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