She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Randomize