Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
Randomize